Interaction with the Narcissist: A Manual for the Terms of the Game (In the Loop of the Narcissist #1)

Description

Interaction with the Narcissist, A Manual for the Terms of the Game offers a concise handbook for understanding the terms that involve all interactions with a toxic individual. The manual is provided for the targets of narcissistic people. The information is based on years of experience and studies about the interactions that could produce victims but does not have to. The handbook offers the knowledge that could have spared the author the hard lessons learned about herself and others had she known about the information at an earlier age. Terms such as Love Bombing, Idealization, Devaluation, Discard and No Contact are several of the terms which define the interactions between the narcissistic type of individual and their target. The author provides the signals or red flags which should alert a potential target to the dangers of interacting with toxicity. The focus is not on the damage to the individual but rather on the potential for the target to recognize the opportunity to learn and change from their involvement with the narcissist or difficult person. The manual's focus is on the clarity that is possible when the target refuses to accept the role of victimhood. The book is not about blame or hate. It is about forgiveness of and moving forward with improved self esteem and boundaries. The author viewed over five thousand hours of videos on the topic of relationships. She knew nothing about narcissism in the beginning stages of her involvement with her partner. After the initial discard, she was desperate to make sense of the extreme feeling of abandonment that she experienced. She knew that after ten years, the seemingly abrupt and callous discard did not make sense. She explored and investigated and uncovered lies and layers of lies that she had accepted as truths. She looked at herself for believing the lies told to her. She accepted her role in the interaction. Her pain lessened with each new day of learning. She had many set backs when she broke the No Contact. It took her nearly three years to recover emotionally from the love bombing and gas lighting which indoctrinated her to a toxic soul tie. Her approach to self healing and ownership in the interaction demonstrates accountability and empathy. The lack of empathy, a complete attitude of entitlement and an abysmal deficit in accountability are the hallmarks of narcissism at its worst. The target who is healed does not blame. The narcissist blames everyone for their poor behavior and choices. It is up to each individual to journey through life, ever changing and growing. Sharing knowledge and success with our loved ones and yes, even strangers can change the world one person at a time. For the many sufferers navigating their way out of the darkness of abuse, it is hoped that this manual will serve a purpose. It is not a scientific manual and the author does not claim to have any medical or counseling degrees. She is a teacher who possesses two master degrees in education. She has raised four responsible, successful and happy adult children. She hopes that the reader will explore further to seek answers and clarification on the topic of malignant narcissism. There are many resources available to the inquisitive reader thirsty for knowledge about human interaction. The impact of toxic narcissism on society as a whole and the ramifications of the pervasiveness of its destruction warrants the education of this topic in schools, hospitals and businesses. The author's purpose is to highlight the dysfunction and the role that the narcissist and the target play in their interaction. Not every dysfunctional relationship involves narcissism, but every dysfunctional relationship surely lacks clear communication on agreeable goals.